Be still and know that I am God...sometimes that is hard to do. Especially days like today. Jimmy and I are sitting here wondering what brought on today's meltdown. Jimmy took this round while I tried to finish up making the grocery list through tears streaming down my face. It is so hard seeing her this way. The hardest part about it was when she was calming down-she was asking God to please take her home. She says she is ready to go home and that she is tired of being the way she is. It breaks my heart to see her this way. I feel so guilty on days like today and the what ifs and only ifs start up. Like, what if I hadn't married her biological father. If I hadn't eloped then I would not of gotten pregnant, and she would not be suffering the way she is. When I am feeling like this, Jimmy is so great at reminding me that God is in control and that if He did not want her to be born then I would not of gotten pregnant. Psalm 139:16 says that God has ordained her days before they came to be. I am praying that God's hand will guide her and his right hand will hold her fast (Psalm 139:10).
Keep fighting for your families and know that God is God and He is in control.
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